¿WHY DO WE GET INTO SO MUCH TROUBLE WHEN IT CUMS TO SEX?

Gay men do have a reputation for sometimes being “douchey” when seeking sex. Sometimes, in the hunt for sex, testosterone takes over and the other part of being male, the more tender part gets submerged for a while. This sometimes creates a gay/bi male subculture where we forget that even with a hookup, tender feelings…

¿WHAT ARE THE SIGNS THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS OVER?

Gay relationships are a different ballgame than straight ones. We live in an oversexed culture. We play by different rules. So tell me what are the things that tell you, ‘oh this relationship is done?’

PLACING GAY MEN ON PEDESTALS

When you put other gay men on pedestals, you are giving away your power and saying you are not good enough. When we fall in love with someone or make a new friend, we sometimes see that person in a glowing light. Their good qualities dominate the foreground of our perception and their negative qualities….

GAY MAN & THE ‘HOE’ MANAGEMENT STRUGGLE

We’ve all heard the phrase, “With great beauty comes great responsibility” and if you can’t handle that, then you just end up a hoe. We all know someone who’s totally stunning, but has a hoop like a calamari ring. Yes, the key adjective… is ‘battered’. As gay men, we understand the need for validation, (unfortunately…

GENDER FLUID: GRINDR ISN’T JUST FOR GAY MEN ANY LONGER

Grindr, the popular hookup app for gay men, has gone genderfluid to be more inclusive of transgender people and women. A new update being pushed out this week will add more options for users to self identify their gender and choose their pronouns. The update was done to make the app more trans-friendly. The company announced the…

PUSHING THE WRONG SEXUAL BUTTONS…

Sexually, many of us are displeased with our playmate choices after surfing online, arranging to meet one another, and then discovering that you were misunderstood somewhere in the communication process. After going to the effort to meet, realizing you and your potential playmate are not in sync is very irritating. How could your potential playmate…

THANKSGIVING DINNER DATE…

Thanksgiving isn’t just about turkey and stuffing, and the inevitable next-day food hangover. It’s also about spending time with your closest friends and family members, and being thankful for the people you have in your life. And that means that it’s a tricky dinner to navigate when you’re in the beginning stages of a new relationship. How long…

¿WHY DO MANY GAY MEN DISLIKE SEEING A BLACK MAN “BOTTOMING” IN PORN?

Ever notice how hard it is to find blacks bottoming for whites in interracial porn? With few exceptions, porn studios seem to think there is only one acceptable way to show interracial sex: The hyperaggressive African-American top and the submissive white bottom. Is gay porn racist? Or is it a benign form of stereotyping? Like…

¿WHAT CAN YOU LET OF RIGHT NOW WITHOUT LOSING A THING?

Honestly, there’s so much you can let go of in life without losing a thing.  It’s called growth. Letting go of old ideals makes way for new opportunities. Letting go of what isn’t working makes way for what will. When the pain of holding on is worse than the pain of letting go, it’s time…