SILVER LININGS…

Without clouds in one’s life where would be the opportunities to see and appreciate the clearing? To not feel in terms of sadness, grief, depression, etc. there would not be the deep feelings of love and compassion. Like the parts of the earth that get no rain, little can grow and blossom. Sometimes, feelings that…

WHY WE IN THE GAY COMMUNITY NEED TO RETHINK HIV PREVENTION

We’ve come so far in the terms of where we are in HIV prevention. Gone are the days of the tombstone adverts. Now we live in an age where the majority of gay and bisexual men living with HIV have the condition under control. So if this is the case, why are we still seeing…

(UN)SAFE SEX: ¿A RIGHT OR PRIVILEGE?

I think people are a bit immune to the burden of having safe sex, not liking condoms and getting horizontal with a sense of entitlement where people think: ‘it’s my right to have unsafe sex’. Why are so many content with living in a world of no consequences? Apparently as gay men, we’re even more…

AGE DIFFERENCES IN RELATIONSHIPS…

Imagine you meet this guy; you both get along well, you start seeing each other often and going on dates. But there is one thing bothering you: there is a big age gap between you. You are in your early 20s and he is much older. Should/would you stop seeing him? Would a gap in…

WHEN THE TOP/BOTTOM DEBATE MOVES BEYOND PHYSICAL TRAITS…

Hey, there are plenty of folks out there who don’t like bottoming and even some who don’t like to top. Why? Because gay sex is only legible to straight people in terms of the heterosexual matrix, and if someone’s son is fucking a dude/is a top, well then that’s way preferable than if he was…

THE 8th GAY OF X-MAS: THE GIFT OF DARK DAYS

Darker days are just as much a part of life as are the days graced with sunshine. When we refer to a “beautiful day,” we are often describing a day that is sunny, clear, and without a cloud in sight to mar a sky that is a brilliantly perfect blue. We find ourselves bouncing along,…