Of course, “skin on skin” has special meaning in the age of HIV, particularly around the role of condoms. I don’t think anyone would dispute that having sex without a condom feels pretty good. However, I have a couple of questions. The first question is: How much do we really love ourselves? Admittedly, that is not such an easy question to answer. The question that follows is probably pretty obvious: Why can’t we seem to love ourselves enough to take the best possible care of ourselves?   

The goal is not to back anyone into a corner. But I do want to encourage us to consider what it means to have risky sex. Sure, it feels really great at the time. Maybe even so mind-blowing it feels like a spiritual experience. And in the heat of the moment, it’s hard to deny yourself something that you enjoy so much.   

But I’m wondering if the enjoyment in the moment isn’t being overshadowed by the concerns about the potential risk to your health that are also coming up for you.

How do we get to the point where we listen to that inner voice that is questioning the wisdom of bareback sex? That voice that doesn’t criticize, scold or make us feel guilty.