66866011_487444195339395_8256929529679839232_o_487444192006062The entire concept of virginity wasn’t made for us.

And yet many in the gay community have simply adopted the term to be referred to anal intercourse instead – even though vaginal intercourse occurs in our community too!

Some believe that you have to be both passive and active in intercourse to lose your virginity, where areas others believe you only have to take one of the said positions to lose virginity.

Then there are those like myself who feel any form of sexual intimacy results in a loss of virginity.

In my own opinion, there is no right or wrong answer.

You lose your virginity when you feel that your virginity is lost.


One Comment Add yours

  1. I was a Youth Coordinator several years back for GMAD-Gay Men of African Descent and this question often came up as my youth group ranged from ages 14-27. The guidelines I gave them in workshops and then would pass on to the adults group is that just as State guidelines around consent and hetero child rne is age specific—generally 14-16, it has to be so considered for non-hetero children for legal reasons. Just because a sexuality is perhaps less regulated or monitored doesn’t mean that some of the general guidelines aren’t helpful to outline actions and maturity. A 35 year old man doesn’t need to be helping a 14 get deflowered through anal and oral sex. We would frown upon that if it were heterosexual and prosecute. Equality sometimes means that you have to stand in the same box as those slightly different than you because they have rights that you need to keep you safe as well. As an aside in running the older men’s group far too many of them, unhealthy in their current lives, traced back their sexual exposure to way too young and couldn’t connect molestation, sexual abuse and their current unhealthy views of themselves, sex and sexuality.


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