Bottom shaming is real and a lot of it stems from misogyny and our history with culture and race. Prejudice against women seems to have made its way into our culture. It originates from the idea that dominant masculinity is the idea of G.I. Joe soldiers and femininity equivocates to Betty Cocker pots and Easy Bake Ovens. Because someone enjoys being penetrated by a penis like a woman would in her vagina, it’s as if similar struggles woman face in society apply to our own subculture, yet we’re the ones leading our own illiberal mob. Bottoming is looked upon as emasculating, ripping away at one’s manhood with every thrust. Well, guess what? Surprise! Men do not have vaginas. We’re all still men.

Don’t you dare be sexually liberated and like to bottom either; that’s the illogical theme. Society praises men for the amount of “game” they have when it comes to dating and sex. The more sexual partners a man can add to their roster, the more credit he builds and the more men and women want to invest in hime; unless you’re a bottom. Then you’re a cum pig and a whore.

People label the “Sex and the City” character Samantha Jones of as “the ho,” and men who bottom seem to face the same treatment if they dare to openly embrace their sexuality. Sure, statistics show that the receptive partner is at a higher risk of contracting STIs like HIV, especially if the insertive partner is uncircumcised and ejaculates. But both men are responsible for taking the correct preventative measures to have a healthy, pleasurable sex life.

I’ve watched gay men who identify as tops verbally degrade bottoms. Labeling men who bottom as “my hos” when they were the ones having more random sex than their partners.

We have to stop letting people’s sexual roles be a representation on how we digest our brother’s character and reputation. We already have enough battles to fight with stereotypes that mainstream media and society label the LGBT community. What you enjoy sexually as a man does not define who you are, nor does it suggest how we treat each other.

Some men like makeup. Some men don’t. Some men wear fitted baseball caps. That same man can have a weekly manicure appointment. Some men are more feminine than others. There are far more than 50 shades of gay, and until we stop stereotyping and degrading each other it is only going to slow the process of social acceptance and equality. We all play for the same team.

5 Comments Add yours

  1. galby68 says:

    Pro-tip for tops: font piss off the bottoms, they outnumber us and are tougher than we are!
    On a serious note, though, I love how you ended this post. I’ve been saying for years that the gay community was missing its “unity”.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Robert Neal says:

      I enjoy giving and performing oral sex, but I do not understand anal sex. Don’t other men find it as painful as I do?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. galby68 says:

        I don’t care for being on the receiving end at all.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Gray Lowery says:

    I have never read about issues so lengthy but told everything I needed to hear

    Liked by 1 person

  3. nubianikigai says:

    I totally agree with the final statement “There are far more than 50 shades of gay, and until we stop stereotyping and degrading each other it is only going to slow the process of social acceptance and equality. We all play for the same team.” To be honest I too…despite the fact that I enjoy bottoming do sometimes feel the self loathing of not being man enough. I still do sometimes find it hard to accpet that part of my sexuality and it makes it tough to look in the mirror at times. At other instances I have also been critcal of other bottoms, seeing them as ‘fem’, or just being ‘too’ gay…if that were possible for anyone to be too gay…

    But recentlyt I watched a moving where there was a young boy caught up between two worlds (being a soldier and being gay). He was bottom. What struck me was the fluidity with which he ‘assumed the position’. He was, for me, the personification of what being bottom means.
    He go into bed, on his back and so naturally received his man by wrapping his arms and legs around him, and then flipped over willing anticipating the penetration. I’ve never seen two men make love in such beautiful way before….Thats it!!…he was beatuifully expressing himself.
    It was my wake up call….He reminded me of a greek Nymph, this mythical spirit or goddess, a beautiful young woman, a mythical female spirit, a sexually mature and attractive young woman who is on the whole kindly disposed toward men.
    .. And so as of this point. Bottoms, for me are the NYMPHS of our gay culture.

    Liked by 1 person

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