You think he wanted you to keep going. He thought you wanted to keep going. Turns out neither of you particularly wanted to keep going. Do you see where this is going?

For you and your partner, how does sex generally happen? Is it first, foreplay. Second, he climaxes from oral stimulation? Third, you have intercourse until you climax? (That’s oversimplified, sure, but you get the point.)

Are we as gay men too much about the stamina to rethink how long sex should last? Spending most of our energy trying not to climax, assuming you both want it to last longer can be a mood killer.

After being together for a while, how do you deal with this foundational misunderstanding about your sex life? What do you do about the influences that have shaped (often misguided) expectations about you and your partner’s sexual performance?